5 Reasons SPICY Books Make Sex Better

Why are more and more women (and men!) reading spicy or sexy books? Are they really having more sex? Better sex?

Look just about anywhere online in book spaces- Looking at you Booktok!- and you'll see that books with open door sex scenes are all the rage right now. We read and we don't judge! Let's take a look at 5 top ways that reading erotica can help make real life sex better.

1. "I did not know that about myself"- I have heard this from multiple people when reading these types of books. Whether it's finding a new kink, experiencing pleasure from a particularly spicy scene, or finding arousal in expected ways, it's undeniable that people are learning new things about themselves and how they experience pleasure from reading. This can be a low/no pressure way to learn about different types of sex with different configurations of partners and anatomy. You may also find some things that are definite turn-offs for you. And in sex therapy, knowing your "YUCKS" is just as important as knowing your "YUMS!"

2. Increasing arousal and feeling sexier during the day - It seems pretty intuitive that when we engage with sexual material, we may find ourselves seeking sexual stimulation or just having sex on the brain more often. This can be a great hack for people missing that spark or feeling disconnected from that part of their lives. This is also great reason so give audiobooks a try, imagine *spicing* up your drive home after a long day in the office and see what happens next.

3. Improving vocabulary and comfort with conversations- Remember #1 when I said that people can learn about themselves by reading erotica, well this is huge for helping in relationships too. By exposing ourselves to sexual language, we can become more comfortable using these words to ask for what we want with a partner. It doesn't seem so scary or wrong to ask for a pleasurable act if we can describe it (or read it out loud) to a partner.

4. "Am I normal?" - Look there is no such thing as normal in sex therapy. But this is a question that comes up all the time. Reading about different types of sex and discussing these with friends can be an exciting way to find your place on the kinky spectrum. Consider starting a Spicy Book Club with your closest friends, and you may just get to know yourself a bit better.

5. (Re)Claiming Sexual Identity - Speaking for a minute to millennials, can we just acknowledge for a second what growing up with purity culture did for sexual expression? It was tough out there in the early 2000s. Whether you grew up in a "sex is for reproduction" household or not, many of us were not encouraged to explore pleasure and sexuality. For many, many people out there, reading erotica is a sort of rebellion against this. It is allowing folks to claim their sexuality and sensual desires in a safe and possibly private way. This is a VERY GOOD thing!

   
   

So there you have it. 5 reasons to try spicy books or other erotica. Your sex life just might thank you!!